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Showing posts with label 2013. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2013. Show all posts

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Photography Journey: Part 4

Photography Journey: 2008-2014

2008:

2008: one of the first photos I ever took with my new camera. 


2008: Portraits were fun!

2008: Juji as a baby was a popular subject.


2009

2009: blurry is artsy!
2009: New Hampshire is just naturally beautiful!


2010:
2010: One of my first gigs: shooting my cousin's Senior Portraits!

2010: Another Senior Portrait session!


2011:

2011: Engagements were awesome fun to shoot!

2011: A lil bokeh, a heart...how cliche can I get? 

2012:

2012: Balloons! This was the year all about COLOR!

2012: Have I mentioned how much I *love* engagements?
2012: Piano & color, two of my fallbacks for school assignments!

2012: The portrait that won me Best of Category in the Spring Exhibit!

2013:

2013: Engagement Ring

2013: Freedom From Fear - a school project.


2013: Freedom of Worship - a school project.
2013: Books are magical

2014:

2014: Self-portrait
2014: Tea cups are my thing.


I kinda chuckle as I look back over the years and see how my photography was so horrible when I first started out. But then I also smile and feel a sense of accomplishment as I see how far I've come as well.
It's been one hell of a journey and I've grown! I love that. I love the looking back and seeing how
I've changed and how my photography has changed. I love seeing my techniques expand and
change as the years go by. It's only been 6 years (only??) but I'm excited to see where my 
photography takes me in the next 6 years. 

Sunday, January 5, 2014

I Am Not Who I Used To Be

Jan. 1, 2013. 
2013 was a long and hard year, full of self-discovery and struggles. I can see how I am still the same person I was on Jan. 1st, 2013 but I also see the changes, the growth. 

I'm not who I used to be. 

While I feel like in some ways I took two steps back for each step I took forward, I know that I've learned so much in 2013, about life, about myself.

I learned it's okay to love myself, that I don't have to be perfect in everything to still be worthwhile.

I learned it is far easier to ask forgiveness than to grant it, which is sad.

I learned that I am strong, I am smart, and I am worthwhile.

I learned that it's okay to be different...I am not the girl who wants to go out and party and have the same experiences as most adults in their 20s. I am quiet, I like being alone, I am bookish, nerdy, a planner, and not as spontaneous as some people wish me to be. And that's okay. 

I learned that it is not always easy to love others, but it is worth it.

I learned that the hard things, the struggles make the triumphs even more valuable.

I learned that opening myself up, being completely vulnerable is as scary as hell, but sometimes life calls for me to be vulnerable to those around me.

I learned that I make a difference in people's lives. Even though it is in the smallest ways, I do matter. 

I learned life's never going to be easy but fighting my way through the world transforms you into the person you were meant to be.

In spite of everything, I've learned that no matter how many hours, days, weeks, months, seasons, years go by...

I am still me.

Jan. 1st, 2014. 
I am Sam. 

And for the first time in forever, I love being me, imperfections and all.




Thursday, January 2, 2014

2013: Looking Back



1. What did you do in 2013 that you'd never done before? 

I worked at a summer camp & fell in love with working with kids like I've never done before. It made me rethink my life goals. 

2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I'm not sure if I actually made any New Year's resolutions...I'm sure if I did that I didn't fulfill them so much. I'm terrible at keeping resolutions. 

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Not in 2013 but someone will be in 2014! I'm to be an aunt for the first time! 

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No, thank God. 

5. What countries did you visit?
Sadly none. I think the only times I left the state were to hit the beach in Maine and to visit friends in Connecticut. 

6. What would you like to have in 2014 that you lacked this year?
Less anxiety/stress more happiness. More love for myself and others, more of everything. I hope for a much fuller year. 

7. What dates from 2013 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Many unpleasant ones but also December 19th, the day I finished my last exam for my Associates degree. And April 25th, the day I won Best of Photography at school! 

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Finishing my Associates degree! The first life-changing step I took began in fall 2011 and was completed winter 2013. I survived!

9. What was your biggest failure?
Viewing myself as a failure too many times to count, giving in to my anxiety. 

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
The usual migraines, colds...two colds one on top of each other during a school semester? May we never have to relive!
11. What was the best thing you bought?
My new laptop! Such a blessing to finally be able to edit photos without the laptop crashing every hour or so! 

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Genevieve & Amy, my two best friends, and Krista, my big sis. They love me still, after all this time. 

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Too many people for my own good. ;) 

14. Where did most of your money go?
Gas and school! 

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
My summer job, learning I'm going to be an aunt!, winning Best of Photography in the Spring Exhibit at school!, graduating! 

16. What song will always remind you of 2013?
Just one? My life is full of songs, reminding me of moments, months, seasons, moods, emotions! There's not just one! However, Lana Del Rey's "Young and Beautiful", Frozen's "Let It Go", and Gym Class Heroes "There Goes a Fighter" all stick out in my memory. It's been a good year of music. 

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?
a). Both, b). Same as last year. c). richer, only the slightest bit and only because I don't have to pay for another semester quite yet. 

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
I wish I had written more, finished my novel. I wish I had done more, been more of a person, loved life more, been more daring!

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Worrying. 

20. How did you spend Christmas?
Relaxing on the couch, hanging with the kids, watching Veronica Mars, and eating yummy foodses. 

21. Did you fall in love in 2013?
I fell in love with who I am. Wait, you mean love-love? ;) No, and I'm okay with that. 

22. What concerts did you attend this year?
None...not a concert person really. 

23. What was your favorite TV program?
It's been a good year for tv! Doctor Who, Community, Downton Abbey, Pretty Little Liars, Parks and Recreation, Supernatural...

24. Do you dislike anyone now whom you didn't dislike this time last year?
Oh, yes, sadly. 

25. What was the best book you read?
The Book Thief, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Just One Day...three books etched in my brain.
26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Lana Del Rey...really the only new discovery I made...

27. What did you want and get?
My degree ;) , a job I loved, a new laptop, headphones...

28. What did you want and not get?
My own car

29. What was your favorite film of 2013?
Without a doubt, utterly and completely, Catching Fire. Best film I've seen in a LONG time. Followed closely by Frozen.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 24 and spent the day at school and work, celebrating by eating pie with the fam in the evening. It was just another day in my life. Nothing exciting. 

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
More strength. 

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2013?
Skinny jeans, sweaters/hoodies, & boots for fall/winter and shorts, tshirts, & flipflops for spring/summer. Total casual. 

33. What kept you sane?
Linda, Krista, Amy, Gen, music, writing. 

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Joseph Gordon-Levitt & Jensen Ackles. Oooh la la, hotties. 

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
I find political issues to be more annoying and usually a waste of energy to debate with others, so I keep my opinions to myself unless someone asks. 

36. Who did you miss?
Amy. Too many months of being apart. 

37. Who was the best new person you met?
Kathleen. :) The Katniss to my Rue, the very definition of "kindred spirit". 

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2013.
It's okay to be imperfect, it's okay to screw up, it's okay to love yourself. 

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

The snow glows white on the mountain tonight
Not a footprint to be seen
A kingdom of isolation, and it looks like I’m the Queen
The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside
Couldn’t keep it in, heaven knows I've tried

Don’t let them in, don’t let them see
Be the good girl you always have to be
Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know
Well now they know

Let it go, let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn away and slam the door
I don’t care
What they’re going to say
Let the storm rage on, the cold never bothered me anyway

It’s funny how some distance
Makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me
Can’t get to me at all

It’s time to see what I can do
To test the limits and break through
No right, no wrong, no rules for me
I’m free

My power flurries through the air into the ground
My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals all around
And one thought crystallizes like an icy blast
I’m never going back,
The past is in the past

Let it go, let it go
And I'll rise like the break of dawn
Let it go, let it go
That perfect girl is gone
Here I stand in the light of day
Let the storm rage on,
The cold never bothered me anyway