The love and faithfulness is so deep, 

that the forgiveness and joy 

is so easy to give. 

Last night, I sat at a table across from my friend, looking at her grinning at me with huge excitement. My name was called and I stood, walked to the front of the room, shook my professor's hand and accepted the certificate he gave me. I had just won Best of Category for one of my photographs.  I returned to my seat, and there, my friend was sitting in positive giddiness.

We left the building to celebrate. But it wasn't the going out to eat junk food and talk and giggle that was the celebration. The celebration was the bond of immense love and excitement and giddiness and clamors of, "Let me take your picture with it (the certificate)!!" It was the joy that my friend felt for me. In that moment, as I stood, my back to the sunset, facing my friend as she pointed my iphone at me, I realized that I was blessed.  Not because I had won some contest, but because my friend stood before me, literally jumping up and down because she was happy for me. 

I've had so many friendships throughout my life time that have ended. Some just quietly fell apart, as we each grew into the people we are today, changing in personalities and interests and goals. Some broke apart badly, hurt words and feelings. Some friendships died off on one end of the relationship...leaving the other to feel rejected. 

Then, I have and have had the friendships where the relationship status is still "friends", but the friendship is shallow, built on fake promises, smiles, and air. 

These friendships are the kind where someone, every once in a great while, contacts you with requests to hang out. You respond enthusiastically but then...there's no reply. 

There is no "ship" with this "friend"...no real relationship. It is made out of air. No depth. 

It takes two people to build a relationship, to keep it going, to strengthen it, to make it better, to build it. Perhaps this is where people go wrong...believing that a friendship occurs naturally and stays naturally. Friendships may occur naturally, but like any relationship, it is going to have its rough patches and moments where you have to work. 

I can get all "spiritual" and quote you verses on friendships and about "iron sharpening iron"...but I think the words that hit close to home for me are: 

Encourage one another and build one another up... 

- 1 Thes. 5:11

Build.  What goes into building? Work. Time. Sacrifice. Effort. 

I struggle with impatience and annoyance because of the friendships I have where I feel like I'm the only one who makes an effort, who struggles to try to make the friendship work, where I sacrifice...the moments where I have to come up with the time and place and details of a visit...the nagging I have to do in order to get a friend to commit or even just to respond to me, even after they first contact me. The impatience of agreeing to a commitment of writing and realizing that friend is never going to respond to my letter. 

Last night, I sat across from my friend...the friend who left straight from work without stopping to tidy up or change just so that she could be there for me. The same friend who insisted we go out to celebrate afterward, buying me pizza. The friend who insisted on driving me home after, just so that we could spend more time together and my brother could use our (the bro's and mine) car. The friend who was GIDDY with excitement because I had won something. The friend who sat with me when I was hurt by someone's words and hugged me tight. The friend who came to pick me up and take me out when my car broke down, leaving me home on a weekend. The friend who bought me coffee, drove all the way to my town to bring me a smoothie. 

And then, there is my other friend. The dear sweet friend who drives up the 2 hours every other month or so to spend the weekend with me, because I cannot make the drive myself. The one who never, never, fails to keep a commitment, whether it be: text, PM, IM, phone call, late night chat, or get-together. The friend who I know will NOT just ignore my texts, who will NOT just brush me aside when I suggest a visit, who will do ANYTHING to be there for  me. Even if she's not immediately available, this friend never forgets to contact me when she has a free moment. The friend who calms my ruffled feathers and talks me out of doing something stupid, and yet has the patience and good humor to listen to my every rant. The friend who tells me "Love you!" every time we talk. 

Friendship is not just a natural process. It is built...and it is not always easy. But it is worth the effort because of the love, the faithfulness, the loyalty, the unspoken joy we share with each other, my two best friends and I. Because no matter what, we know we can count on each other. There is no moment of jealousy or dislike. We annoy each other, as any people can, we disagree, we mess up, but we build each other up. The love and faithfulness is so deep, that the forgiveness and joy is easy to give. 

Friends build each other. And I am blessed with two friends who build me up.